By Jeff Olsen
This one is for you, Toots!
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May 13, 2017
Beautiful. It's Mother's Day this Sunday, and what's a guy to do to make her day?
I hate sucking up.
Breakfast in bed?
Forget that.
I'd burn the toast and get chewed out.
A fancy card?
Forget that.
Those Hallmark cards never say what you want to say in your own words.
They're too flowery.
They include such sweet things you'd never say to your mom or your wife or your girlfriend - if you have a kid or two with her.
Yes, it helps to buy her something meaningful - something that takes her breath away.
Like a pocket knife.
A nice shotgun.
A fishing pole.
A good broom.
A pair of binoculars.
A ri...
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