It ain't likely I'm going to Heaven

Darn!

I neglected to buy one of Trump's nifty Bibles. It's a possibility that any number of Roseau County folks paid the $59.99 plus shipping for this unique keepsake.

Why don't they list it at 60 bucks?

It went on sale during Holy Week and what a blessing for Trump, who sells God's word to the faithful.

Forget the tooth fairy.

God will save your miserable, thieving gullible souls, thanks to Trump.

"Where's the jelly beans and chocolate bunnies?" snarls little Sheldon, a brat who flies into a rage and starts chewing on the carpet after mommy hands him the Bible, according to King Donald.

Chew...